small shoes

i grew up wearing shoes that were too big.
my mom always bought shoes that were a size or two too big so that i could own a single pair of shoes for longer than 4 months or whatever. i could grow into them. i think my mom always overestimated how fast my feet grew though, because my shoes would always fall apart before they became too small. i guess i just started to believe that this was how shoes were supposed to fit - all loose and floppy.

when i became a man, i put away childish things. i started buying my own shoes. and i bought them big. loose and floppy.

i think all anyone wants in life is to find a pair of shoes that really fits well and feels good on their feet. how satisfying is a life spent wishing you had bigger feet or squeezing your feet into a shoe that's too small?

also

my mom is a thin as a rail. my dad... thin as a rail. both of them for reasons more than just 'that's the way they're built.' whatever the case may be, i have consequently been built... pretty thin. (i don't want to say "rail" but still...)
as a result, it's difficult to find t-shirts that fit me well. either it's too short, or too wide, or too something. most of my shirts leave me feeling like i wish i was a bit bulkier. some of my shirts fit me in some places and end up feeling too small for me in others.

i think all anyone wants in life is to find t-shirts that fit them really well and helps them improve how they feel about themselves. how satisfying is a life spent wishing you filled out your shirts more or putting up with unwanted midriff?