dreams (am i crazy?)

i literally dreamed of my grades last night because i was so excited to check my grades today.

so, here i am, checking them. they're just what i thought they'd be. it's like checking your airplane reservations again and again... kind of.

two nights ago (i'm not sure if it was a dream or not) the image of a big shiny black spider with a bright alarming red hourglass on it's belly flashed through my mind for no longer than a 1/3 of a second.

instantly my mind went wild and i didn't sleep well for the rest of the night. "what if i get bit by a black widow?", "andrew once got bit by a black widow and he was fine... sure he spent a few days in the hospital, but i could handle that.", "how would i know if i got bit by a black widow before it was too late?", "what would i do with all my stuff while i's in the hospital?", "i'll just tell one of those rv campers to take me to the hospital.", "what if they give me the anti-venom? then it'll never work again!" "there could be a black widow in my tent right now, and i'd have no idea.", "i shouldn't have left my tent flap open all day. dang it! i know better than that too.", "wait... what's this bite on my leg? mosquito? hope so.", "wait how do you know what a black widow bite looks like? what are the symptoms? nervous system break down? shoot, that's happening anyway! my muscles are all sore already too!", "wait, what will i do with all my stuff?"

on and on and on my mind went until i couldn't take it anymore and i'd grab my headlamp and go crazy checking every nook and cranny of my tent/sleeping bag. until at last i was satisfied enough to lay back down. then i'd lay there fore three seconds and my mind would begin to go bananas on me again until i couldn't take it anymore and i'd grab my headlamp...