respect the roots

sure, the plant is pretty.
but it is the roots 

that give it life.

haze

tonight is one of those nights,
where, no matter how many times you blink,
a thick, hazy band blurs the street lights.

ride a bike

i saw this quote cross-stitched, framed and then hung in the bathroom of a thrift store in post falls, idaho. to this day i don't know why i didn't try to buy it from them, but i'll probably never forget it:

"happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, will alight upon your shoulder."

which is both poignant and comical at the same time considering the location of the artwork.

happiness is a butterfly just as much as it is riding a bike. some of the times i've felt the happiness flowing in and through me the most keenly have been riding a bike on a summer evening. and i don't mean with padded shorts and feet clipped in to pedals. i mean with my eyes closed and the wind in my face, and possibly with one or more hands stretched out feeling the air flow through my hands like moments in time.

riding a bike should be fun. it should be happiness. sometimes i get caught up trying to ride a bike faster than, or further than, or tilker than the other guy. sometimes i get caught up in how i look when i ride my bike. or sometimes it's the health benefits that i get hung up on. or how cool or expensive or advanced my bike is.

but whatever it is, it distracts me from the pure enjoyment of riding a bike. floating across the surface of the earth, carried by a magical mix of metals and rubber and air.


and when it comes down to it, a person never forgets how to ride a bike. you never forget how to really ride a bike. you just have to stop trying so hard. just ride a bike. feel the magic.

and the butterfly will land on your shoulder

self

selfishness begets selfishness. that's boringly true. when someone acts selfish toward you or at your expense, the knee-jerk reaction is to be selfish in return. maybe it's to protect yourself from the threat of a selfish person looking out only for themselves, and therefore not looking out for you in the least bit.

but this is obvious. it's too easy. selfishness is easy.

what's interesting to me is unselfishness. it's so unnatural. and why doesn't unselfishness beget unselfishness? that would be fantastic. all it would take was one unselfish person and it would spread around like some kind of disease.

but instead, unselfishness is often met with selfishness. like a stream flowing into a black hole.

my dad once told me that if he lived his life all the way in harmony with his ideals, he would not live very long. it reminded me of jesus. jesus lived his life all the way in harmony with his ideals and, sure enough, he didn't live very long.

selfishness is boring. its too easy. i'm more interested in unselfishness. unselfishness in the face of selfishness. unselfishness that begets unselfishness.

i think that's what love is.

streaming through the holes

i drove all night to get to california.
watched the mile signs go by 6 miles at a time.
fought against the weights resting on my eyelids.

and i'll never forget the feeling when the sun began to rise and the first signs of light broke on the horizon. i began to be able to see the surroundings. they had changed as i drove in the night. the world expanded beyond the beams of my headlights. and my first thought was, very clearly, "i'm gonna make it."

"i'm gonna make it."

spare an angel -chris rice

where's the limit to the pain

her heart can take

before it breaks

in half?

she has no idea how much you love her

or how much you care.

so would you choose one of your best

to be the answer to my prayer:

can you spare an angel tonight

send a little help from your side

'cause somebody's lost down here...

let him wing his way through the dark

carry some of your love into her heart.

(would you? please?)

JT

i recently posted an album on facebook called "2013"
i posted nearly 90 pictures of only about half of the year. when i think back on this time last year and the time that has passed between then and now. it makes me feel happy.
2013 was a great year.
i know it's not over yet, but 2013 came with its share of superstition with the number 13 (okay, so it was no "y2k," but still).
and yet when i look back on it, i smile.

things i've grown unflinchingly confident in so far this year:
-there is no better mirror than another person
-love is indeed a divine, supernatural thing
-i want that divine love to fill my heart all the way up
-"the only thing that matters is just following your heart"
-sometimes life is easier said than done, but it can be done
-i'm not who i want to be, but i'm headed there
-my spirit is strong
-what i want to be when i grow up: happy

so, thank you for 2013.
i can hardly wait to see what 2014 has in store for me.
but let's have christmas first!