moment of clarity

may all beings be well
may all beings be happy
may all beings be at peace

may all beings be free

one more time

if you ask me one more time if i'm "ok to present,"
i'm going to slap you in the face - i swear
i don't know who you guys think i am
i don't know what you assume i'm doing here in million-dollar PT school
if you think i'm completely incompetent
if you think i don't care about anything
you're wrong
and
you're annoying

sometimes

sometimes i get tired of trying so hard to be clever.
meticulously organizing my words on the page like a lit.. oh whatever.
who really cares anyway.
it's like i have this idea of the kind of person people tend to like.
and i want people to like me too... wah wah wah.

sometimes i just want to tell people,
"oh, that's how it's going to be? then you can go **** yourself."

but i don't say that out loud.
instead i choose not to act on those feelings.
i recognize they're just feelings.
feelings probably based on preconceived ideas of my own invention.
and that, my therapist claims, is what matters the most.

and by "my therapist" i mean albus dumbledore.
or something like that.

"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."